The Truth About Global Warming

Ask Bob a Question and he’ll answer it the best he can!

Sara asks:

So what’s up with all this crazy weather..Is global warming really real or what???

P.S. I like ham.

Dear Sara:

I like ham too!

Some religions aren’t allowed to eat ham. That’s sad, because they’re really missing out. But that’s ok, you don’t have to like ham to be a good person. Here in ‘Merica ham and bacon are cherished.

We also cherish our differences, why if everybody ate as much ham and bacon as I do, there wouldn’t be enough to go around…see, it all works out!

Our differences makes it better for everyone.

About that global warming weather.

I predict a warming leading to some really harsh winters that just never end. How warm, I don’t know. But with west coast wild fires becoming a regular thing…It don’t look good.

I assume if the ice caps are melting, then sea levels will increase. An increase in sea levels would lead to more clouds (and smoke from fires), which leads to more moisture, which leads to more storms.

I expect fertile area’s will become deserts, and deserts will become fertile farm land.

This shift will be a nasty process. So yeah, seems to be happening.

So if nature gives us lemons, we could just take those lemons, cut them in half…
and shove ’em in mother nature’s eyes.

When the long winters come, we can shut off that freezer so many of us have in garages and basements. Move the food into a back porch or outside tool shed and keep all that stuff frozen for free!

In the summer, we can save money by putting a delicious ham in a pot and just setting it outside to heat in the warm-warm sun, just like a crock-pot! Good cookin’ for free!

So we got that goin’ for us.

As for those storms, buying a generator for electricity within the next few years might be a good idea. Better yet, they have solar generators these days, that way you don’t have to worry about trying to get fuel when you can’t travel the roads. If you’re on a limited budget, start saving.

In my hometown Omaha, we generally ignored storm warnings and went outside to watch the chaos. But these days, I go right to the basement like your supposed too. Politicians can debate all they want, but if the news says go to the basement or leave town…I’m outta here.

Likewise, it would be nice if cities provided evacuation busses for low income folks to get out of town in emergencies, but they’ll never do that. Politicians seem to be convinced no plan is the best plan, and denial is big on the agenda.

Speaking of denials. Why some politicians deny coronavirus safety precautions, is something I just can’t figure out. Only their supporters follow their advice, then they get sick and die. Are they trying to kill off their own supporters? That just doesn’t make sense to me.

I always assumed some politicians were just mean-mean people. Tricking their followers to support things like trickle down economics. Which only makes the poor, poorer. I thought it was all a cruel joke, and they were behind the curtains laughing.

But a year ago my mind changed.

When I saw politicians speaking against safety precautions during a world wide pandemic, I realized they aren’t cruel, just really-really-really stupid people. Believing and supporting whatever they’re told. They can’t tell the difference between right and wrong,

Based on their actions, it seemed like the only explanation is cruelty, or stupidity.

But there is another…

Maybe they are trying to kill off as many people as they can. No matter the political affiliation. Currently, they’re trying to make wearing masks in school illegal so unvaccinated kids will catch it and die.

But why? Why are they trying to kill off the population?

Isn’t protecting children a basic instinct of every animal on the planet?

Why yes, yes it is.

Unless you’re not from this planet.

Perhaps these politicians are not from Earth.

That would explain a lot.

If these politicians are aliens who plan to take over the world. Then it makes perfect sense that they want to destroy as many humans as easily as possible. Maybe Trump was right, the virus was developed in a lab.

But not in China.

Not on this planet.

When its all over and done with, these politicians will take off their fake human masks and reveal themselves as our future reptilian overlords. Then, they’ll send word to their mothership which will swoop down from the skies and finish us off.

Yeah, it’s all starting to make sense now.


Song in my head…

This came to mind when I saw all the protests last year.

COMING NEXT: What caused this global warming?

More Ask Bob…

Bob Senitram

Webmaster and editor of TheWeirdcrap.com. I obtained a bachelors degree in micro-biology around the turn of the century, but was quickly tracked down and forced to return it to its rightful owner and pay a $25 fine. *** A fan of science fiction, I started this website in 1999 as a portal for science fiction stories that have never been published.*** Completely devoid of talent, I decided to call on the public to supply content. Shortly afterwards Stephen and myself started writing weekly columns and have continued to this day.

http://TheWeirdcrap.com

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