Ask Bob

“Ask Bob” by Bob Senitram has been infecting the world with nonsense since Al Gore invented the interweb. Everything from the origin of the universe to the origin of the chronic butt itch.

The Very Most Recent Things!

Getting ready to get ready!

June 7, 2021

Getting Ready! I like to read the daily paper so my columns will be current. I don’t use one of those fancy electronic aps that show up in tiny print on a phone. Nope, not me. I prefer a real newspaper made out of real…

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50 Ways to catch Corona…

May 24, 2021

Ask Bob Last week I was running errands for my wife. I didn’t want to, but again the sugar cubes worked their magic and next thing I knew I was at the dry cleaners…

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Ask Bob: To “V” or not to “V”

May 16, 2021

By Bob Senitram The other week while watching t.v. I heard the President stress, “I urge every American to go get your shot…” Wanting to be a good American, not only did I get one…I stayed at that bar til’ closing time with multiple shots…

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Bob Senitram’s State of the Union

April 16, 2021

(Originally posted on 03/14/2006) I came out of retirement to share my opinions of the political landscape! In the spirit of Shark Tank… Donald Trump: I could bore you to death with facts. Instead I’ll describe him using his own terms. Donald Trump is a…

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Money from Nothing – Part III

September 2, 2018

This is a continuing series called “Money from Nothing,” which means if you’re an average Joe that is just getting by paycheck to paycheck to pay bills and not able to save or have a back-up fund, then this is for you.  Not a get…

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Money for Nothing Part II

July 16, 2018

Ok, I’m a little late getting part II out.  I finished this about 2 weeks ago, but had to sit on it for a little while before the release.  Now I concluded the original Part II was much too long and I need to leave…

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Money From Nothing – Part I

June 20, 2018

Back in the end of 1999, Stephen and I decided to build “TheWeirdcrap.com”.  We had no idea what to do with it at the time, but one feature we kept going for a good 16 years was our weekly blog (columns back then).  Around 2016…

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HE’S DAAAIIID! HE’S DAAAID! HE STINKS AND HE DON’T MOVE!

March 14, 2016

Recently I head the rumor that “Bob Senitram” had died and thats what happened to the famous “Ask Bob” column.  No one present knew that I was the very much alive Bob Senitram. I never had financial goals for TheWeirdcrap, but I did have the…

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The much awaited EASTER SPECIAL!

March 30, 2015

Jim from Wichita, KS asks:I’m an Evangelical Christian of the sacred church of the bleeding heart, and I don’t think this Easter bunny things got anything to do with the Church!  So where did this Easter Bunny thing get started from anyways? Dear Jim: Although…

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The world according to Garp…

January 5, 2015

Rather than sharing an interesting or even a moderately interesting story, I’m gonna give you my take on the world. Let’s start with Russia. Putin wants to take control of Ukraine. I say go ahead and let him have it. Since sanctions started, the rubel…

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How about that Ozone?

October 6, 2014

Sam from Philly writes: Dear Bob,How about that Ozone? Bob:Dear Sam: I looked thru every football handbook I could find and couldn’t find a thing about the Ozone.  I thought it might be in some ancient playbook.  Then I realized you must be thinking of…

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Eating Kitty

September 15, 2014

Back in the day, I made my living by driving a truck.  I got my CDL over the road for about five years, then quit.  We moved Florida so the ol’ lady could finish up her college. Thus, it came to pass in these days…

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The Cronic Butt Itch

July 28, 2014

For those new to this column, I’m Bob Senitram.  I am the technical director of “TheWeirdcrap.com” and “My Strange Stories.com.”  TheWeirdcrap.com has been around for 14 years, and has had a faithful following of about 25 people.  At our current fan-base rate, we should be…

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Open the Docking Bay Doors, Hal…

February 17, 2014

Unexpectedly, an alien showed up at my house. I asked, “Are you a Nazi-Space-Alien from Der Daaak Side unt da Moon? He said, “No.”  And I was cool with that. None-the-less, I was late for school ‘cause I missed the bus and here I am…

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In the year 2525…

December 9, 2013

This weekend I watched the movie “Robot and Frank” and realized that that is going to be me in the future. I’ll be seventy, my wife will be in her 50’s and I probably won’t remember who she is.  And my kids will be in…

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CRESENT + FRESH = BOB!

September 3, 2013

“Rayo” writes:Is you fresh?Dear Rayo, Funny you should ask.Just a few weeks ago Stephen Johnson (Lunatic Ravings) was questioning my sincerity of my claims of Cresent Fresh-osity.  But I am very “Crest-at-Best” and nothing demonstrates this more than the time I switched to a new…

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Crescent Fresh

July 22, 2013

I decided to take a look at the newspaper and see what is and is-not cresent fresh! ZimmermanNot guilty? That is totally NOT Cresent Fresh! Reminds me of an instance where I was in a grocery store. I approach an elderly greeter to ask where…

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“You’re not being SILLY…ARE YOU?”

June 10, 2013

  Mitzi writes: Who do you think you are, posting your opinions about things that you obviously know nothing about!  What gives you the right? My Dear Mitzi: First of all, thanks for writing to me!  I haven’t kept track, but I think its been…

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Every turn I make, takes me home…

May 13, 2013

A few months back I explained how my new lap-top made life easier and am now much more likely too write these columns/blogs on a more regular basis. I’ll refresh your memory about the whole situation. 13 years ago, when this column was new, I…

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Time creeps in!

April 22, 2013

I have had a massive brain fart for the last few months…OK, years. Here’s the deal.  When I first started writing the column, 13 years ago, I was in my mid-thirties, married, an alchoholic, with the ol’ lady in grad school.  Basically, I had nothing…

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From The Ask Bob Archives!

The Vent

April 3, 2006

By Brian PetreThis one’s worth telling…So, I’d had a long night out with a couple of coworkers that just happened to be at my local bar. It’s a great dive bar that even has Burlesque shows on Sunday nights. I should know better than to…

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BMS –big meat sandwich?

August 18, 2008

I’m not going to explain what the title means, suffice to say “Harold and Kumar escape from Guantanamo Bay” is the best movie I’ve seen this summer. “Batman,” good special effects, but it never made me laugh. “Space Chimps,” don’t even get me started on…

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Complete Lunatics Archives can be found HERE