The Weird Crap is a weekly publication featuring Alarmingly Strange Stories, Bizarre Columns, Memes and Comics!

Strange Stories

  • Zeep In The City
    -Sci-Fi – 3 Pages – Package runner Alpha One-Six, nicknamed `Zeep’ to endear him to Joe Public and his slobbering troglodyte family, had only been distracted for four hundredths of a second. But in that time, he’d somehow managed to collide with a stationary object; unwittingly knocking out his GPS, comm-link, and access to the…
  • In Green, Remembered
    I awoke knowing the link had been severed.  Tears stung my cheeks as I yanked the blankets off my body and stumbled out of bed, feeling sick and disoriented.                By the time I made it to the bathroom sink in anticipation of throwing up my late night trip to Taco Bell, the feeling had thankfully…
  • Ziontology
    By Mikel Davis “You slimy sack of fish shit!” Deputy Ploggard slammed his hairy fist down onto the grey metal table which separated the two men. His hand landed with such force that it left a fist-shaped dent in the middle of the table. The noise which followed echoed off…
  • “The New Job” by Rance Treakle
    [A Halloween Special from the 2003 Archives] I thought the devil was red and had a tail. I had braced myself for His appearance, His style, even His odor if need be. So what happens when I call Him? He shows up at my door in a three-piece suit, looking like a successful businessman. OK,…

Columns

  • Broken Promises…
    By Bob SenitramJust some guy to tends to be at the wrong place at the wrong time…. I know someone out there must be wondering, “What’s the REAL Bob Senitram like?” Hell, I don’t know myself. But I figure I’ll share a little bit and if you’re curious, you’ll get the gist of it… I’ve…
  • Ask The Spamrider
    So Bob has brought out the whip again and threatened to give me 39 lashes if I didn’t go through the dozen or so bags of fan mail that have been piling up and pick out some letters to write another Ask The Spamrider column.  I asked him why he wouldn’t just give me 40…
  • It’s that Time Again!
    By Bob SenitramNo bacon, just bringing home the nonsense… Well, I’ve been watching all them talking heads on TV and now I guess I got a little somethin’ to say about those midterm elections. To tell the truth, when I was younger, I didn’t think much about Mid-Term elections. I figured, “What difference would it…
  • The New Devil’s Dictionary
    Irony: How rust tastes

Memes

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Comics

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Random Strange Stories

  • Ambulance of Doom

    “Hey there, you alright sir?” “He may not respond.” “Why’s ‘at?” “He appears to be dead.” “Check ‘is pulse?” “Yep.” “Well ‘en, let’s get ‘im in the back.” “Right.” Rick put his hat back on and the two flung the corpse into the back of the ambulance, “Good night, eh?” “Well, if its all the…

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  • A Touch Bitter and Too Clever by Half

    By Kevin Easter There are parts of yourself that you hold back. You have to keep that part inviolate, hidden. It doesn’t matter how much you’re “in love” or how much you “trust” your therapist. That part remains. It’s your soul, your true name, your inner child, and you keep it to yourself. There’s one…

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  • Falling

    6 Pages His attention focused on a woman waiting at the bus stop with a bag of groceries. She was a sad sight to see. Looking back in the window, he saw the television playing music videos inside. Maury looked down at his feet as he stepped off the ledge and began his descent. Feeling…

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  • Functional Family

    2 Pages Writers struggle for the right words, the right feeling. It isn’t always easy and often, life is a series of struggles that have to be overcome. For one young writer, his family shares in his downfall. Wichita Lineman by Glen Campbell is slowly coming to an end in this idyllic setting. The strings…

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Random Columns From Years Gone By

  • Vermin is Vermin

    The planet earth is nothing but a cesspool. A stinking, stagnating cesspool teeming with filthy little vermin called Human Beings. Some people say that the Human Beings have their own even tinier vermin with whom they, like us with them, are at war. And other people say that to some even larger and more complex…

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  • Kurt Russell

    I watched John Carpenter’s The Thing tonight.  I’ve seen it before, or at least I think I have. Great movie by the way. But that’s not why I watched it. I thought maybe seeing Kurt Russell might jar up some old memories of the things I apparently have written about here then subsequently forgotten. Nothing.…

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  • My Old Friend.

    It was in the summer school holidays 1978 when I made a very special friend. Yes, I remember it as distinctly as if it was yesterday. I would have been thirteen years old then.One particularly sunny morning I awoke and over my bowl of cereal I got an idea. I decided to go to the…

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  • An Issue With Sneakers

    S.U.N.—Something Unto Nothing MoTW—Brave I don’t consider myself a cheap kinda guy, but when it comes to sneakers it’s a different story. I’m happy spending $25-$30 on sneakers. As long as they’re mostly white without any fantastical designs, I’m happy. I expect they’ll last a year or so and then I have to come up…

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  • The 2009 Roadtrip: Part 2

    Saga—10,000 Days MoTW—The Exterminator 3:00 pm: Entered New Jersey. Disguise on. Contacted the step sister andtold her we would be in town shortly. She sounded……really thrilled.The cops at the border seemed to be eyeballing me so I flipped them offand sped away. Got lost in traffic. Score 1 for me. 3:30 pmish: After many, many…

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