The Weird Crap is a weekly publication featuring Alarmingly Strange Stories, Bizarre Columns, Memes and Comics!

Strange Stories

Published Bi-Weekly:

Excerpts of the latest fiction submitted by our visitors…

>>>THE LATEST FICTION

  • History of a Hot Sauce: The mysterious Origins of Wassabassco
    by R. Andrew Heidel
    by R. Andrew Heidel and William Morton Our recipe, and Kiki’s lineage, begins in Japan during the waning years of the Edo era when the Tokugawa Shogunate commissioned the Sushi Sensei to discover a wasabi hot enough for the emperor himself. After many years on his dangerous quest, the Sushi Sensei discovered a pure strain…
  • River People
    by Andy Henion
    -Strange – 2 Pages – As far as I can tell there are two types of Tennessee river people and they travel in competing packs and consume washed up fish or this ubiquitous leafy vegetation that I with my northern bearings will only later come to know as kudzu. There are the stoop-shouldered people who…
  • How Roger Hambone Missed His Big Chance
    by Randy Bone
    Roger Hambone despite his last name never learned to hambone. He was hamboneless. But he could eef like nobody’s business. People used to say his name should have been Roger Eef. They called him “Eefin’ Roger Hambone”. When he would eef it sounded like this: Ah ee, ah oh, ah ee, ah oh, [hic], ee,…
  • DABBLING IN THE DEPTHS OF HER SOUL
    by Evgeniya Seizova
    by Evgeniya Seizova Year by year a beautiful young lady was gazing with Her spiritual eyes in her own destruction… Was she a human being anymore? She stared her tired and too dilated pupils once again in the impassable Darkness trying to find a ray of light. So many impossible efforts. They’ve been crushing and…

Columns

Updated Weekly:

Blogs? Columns? Fiction?
Whatever, here’s some excerpts!

>>>NEW THIS WEEK

  • Time Portal
    by Spamrider
    By the grace of Herman I finally somehow managed to rig up an elementary time portal. I know it doesn’t look like much.  But it’s a start.  And it works. And here’s how it works. (This is going to get complicated, so buckle up and settle in…) That door you see in the picture leads…
  • The Journey To HR, Part 106!
    by Stephen Johnson
    I was in a restaurant. I was asked how many people were in my party. I thought about it for a moment, just knowing I would be the only one in my party but held up two fingers anyway. Henry Winkler walked by. Was it Henry Winkler? I was pretty sure it was. A waiter…
  • The End of the USSA?
    by Bob Senitram
    By Bob SenitramWriting the nonsense because, if I don’t, who will? Once or twice a year, I like to put my comedy hat on the workbench and write about something that’s been bouncing around in my head. This is one of those times. And before anybody starts sending me spelling corrections, the title was not…
  • A World Without Bologna Hats
    by Spamrider
    I met a woman the other day. She said, “Bologna doesn’t curl up into a bologna hat when you cook it anymore.  Tell me, what has become of this world?” “This can’t be true!” I exclaimed, vexed and flabbergasted. “But it is!” she replied.  “But it is!” I decided to investigate for myself.  I marched…

Memes

Click here for the whole batch!

Comics

Bunch more here!

Random Strange Stories

  • Head in the Sand

    Head in the sand by CMR Once upon a time there was an ostrich.  The ostrich had no concerns and was content to while away it’s days with it’s head in the sand.  It would awaken that way in the mornings and drift to sleep that way at night.  During the day it would seek…

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  • Decomposition

    腐乱 Decomposition By Kadath Bird & Chie Sakaguchi “Since the day we bit into the fruits of the knowledge of good and evil, mankind has known that they will only damn themselves with their own ability to create..” 地獄 (Hell) They called me cancer. As the centuries passed, it became ever more true. Patches of…

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  • A Deal with the Devil

    “Wh…what am I doing here?” John asked as he reached the checkpoint. “Let’s see,” the guard said, leafing through a thick notebook. “Ah, John Sedgewick. Here it is. Says here you cheated on your wife.” “Well, to be fair, she cheated on me first,” John said, in his defense. “Be that as it may, it’s…

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  • The Sock Puppet That Came In From The Cold (Part 2)

    9 Pages Part 2 of 3: Elsewhere in the city that night, a party was being held: in the police station of all places. But not everyone attending was filled with Christmas cheer. Officer Peter Gumption had rather more worrisome thoughts on his mind. He sat nursing them limply on the couch. An attractive blonde…

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Random Columns From Years Gone By

  • The Remarkable Journey

    By P.S. Gifford It was on a chillingly cold and crisp October early morning several years ago that our peculiar tale began. Although perhaps there is a valid argument to be had for it actually beginning the moment we decided to spend the night in such a place, back in California. Sarah, my wife, and…

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  • My Journey To HR, Part 13-A!

    My journey to HR changed when I exited the small room the lady grabbed me by the throat and threw me against one of the four walls. “Well?” she asked as she held me against one of those walls with one of her two elbows sunk deeply into my one throat. “What did Bob do?” I looked…

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  • Rescued!!!

    It turns out, that Stephen read last week’s column and decided to take action! This would be the second time he saved my life. Don’t get me wrong, Stephens quite the asshole, but I do owe him my life. Now two times over! Many years ago, in the dead of winter, I thought it would…

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  • How To Live…FOREVER!

    Jim-Jim asks:  I wanna live forever.. . BUT HOW? A:  There’s a bunch of theories about living forever. Ponce DeLeon looked for a creek with magic water. Maybe he would have found it if he used a flying rug. Then there’s Tom Robbins. In his book “Jitterbug Perfume” he suggests if you take nice hot bath’s and eat…

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  • life is rarely dull when you are a parent to a sixteen year old..

    Life is rarely dull when you have sixteen year old boy in the house. Now I feel obliged to preface this by saying that Jonathan is typically a very well balanced, good-natured, hard working teenager. But yet hormones and adrenaline along with a constant need to be independent causes dilemmas. Yesterday was a typical point…

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