The Weird Crap is a weekly publication featuring Alarmingly Strange Stories, Bizarre Columns, Memes and Comics!

Strange Stories

Published Bi-Weekly:

Excerpts of the latest fiction submitted by our visitors…

>>>THE LATEST FICTION

  • Notes on Baby-Sitting
    by Nils Erwin
    by Nils Erwin Length: About 6 pages I HAD MY FIRST BABY-SITTING JOB THE OTHER NIGHT. It was tough assignment, 3 kids – 24-hours. The parent was a family friend, Mandy, who seemed to have adopted the absurd notion that I was the man for the job, and moreover, that I should also be paid…
  • Zeep In The City
    by Joshua Blanc
    -Sci-Fi – 3 Pages – Package runner Alpha One-Six, nicknamed `Zeep’ to endear him to Joe Public and his slobbering troglodyte family, had only been distracted for four hundredths of a second. But in that time, he’d somehow managed to collide with a stationary object; unwittingly knocking out his GPS, comm-link, and access to the…
  • In Green, Remembered
    by Christopher Nadeau
    I awoke knowing the link had been severed.  Tears stung my cheeks as I yanked the blankets off my body and stumbled out of bed, feeling sick and disoriented.                By the time I made it to the bathroom sink in anticipation of throwing up my late night trip to Taco Bell, the feeling had thankfully…
  • Ziontology
    by Mikel Davis
    By Mikel Davis “You slimy sack of fish shit!” Deputy Ploggard slammed his hairy fist down onto the grey metal table which separated the two men. His hand landed with such force that it left a fist-shaped dent in the middle of the table. The noise which followed echoed off…

Columns

Updated Weekly:

Blogs? Columns? Fiction?
Whatever, here’s some excerpts!

>>>NEW THIS WEEK

  • A Halloween Special DOUBLE FEATURE!!! Part 1: The Flood
    by Bob Senitram
    By Bob SenitramBecause…aaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhh! This is not much of a horror story but this is a true story. About a month ago we had what they call a 100 year rain. Nothing like what they experience on the coast, but it was pretty horrible for us. And “horrible” is almost “horror”. That’s the best I can…
  • The Way I Remembers It
    by Spamrider
    Before everything gets all crazy and nobody knows what’s real and what’s not anymore, this is the way I remember it all happening. George W. Bush was such a stinking rotten President* that America actually elected a Black guy rather than electing another Republican. This absolutely drove all the latent and blatant racists batshit crazy.…
  • The Journey To HR, Part 123!
    by Stephen Johnson
    Us, being the fine human beings we were, decided Bob could tag along. We wrestled him from the wolverine’s onslaught, tossed him into a pet carrier and went on our merry way. “ID?” asked the bouncer as we entered to strip club. After we showed him ours and he had commented me on how young…
  • Broken Promises: Part III, The Final Insult…
    by Bob Senitram
    By Bob SenitramJust some guy who has no idea what he’s doing…. Back when I was young, I lived by the motto that a man’s word is his bond. Unfortunately, I wasn’t real big on discretion. Turns out, there’s a difference between being a man of your word and being too damn stupid to know…

Memes

Click here for the whole batch!

Comics

Bunch more here!

Random Strange Stories

  • THE SURFER

       For my wife and I the county of Cornwall was an ideal holiday location. Situated in the far west of England, its rugged shores and spectacular beaches had always produced the most memorable times for us. Like many other tourists, part of our affection for Cornwall lay in its wild frontier spirit. There was…

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  • Notes on Baby-Sitting

    by Nils Erwin Length: About 6 pages I HAD MY FIRST BABY-SITTING JOB THE OTHER NIGHT. It was tough assignment, 3 kids – 24-hours. The parent was a family friend, Mandy, who seemed to have adopted the absurd notion that I was the man for the job, and moreover, that I should also be paid…

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  • Karmic Fries

     “Josie and Dhanesh, help me unpack these things,” Steve hollered from the back room. The two walked over. “We were just leaving,” Josie said. “The registers are closed. The store is clean. The garbage is in the dump. Can it wait until tomorrow?” Steve stared at her and cast an impatient sneer. “If it could…

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  • Going bananas

    “I’m afraid, Mr. Smith, that your monkey has cancer,” the vet informed me. “Cancer?” I echoed. “Poor CoCo.” Poor Coco nothing. Poor me was more like it. The damn baboon was a pain in the ass from the get go. And I’d trained my fair share of animals in the past to know a troublemaker…

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Random Columns From Years Gone By

  • F*ck!F*ck!F*ck!

    By Garion Weelll my fuck truck is on the fritz yet again. Maybe I should have changed the oil in the last year or so, but what the hell. I’ve pretty much resigned myself to the fact that it was going to die, and that I wasn’t going to do anything to stop it. I’ve…

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  • My week with the Kids!

    The ol’ lady was out of town for a week so I took care of Baby Gurl I and Baby Gurl II all by my lonesome. This is harder than it sounds ‘cause the kids are now seven and three years old and kids that age often participate in risky play. If they were seven…

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  • Divinity Is In All Things (Especially Goat Cheese)

    For those of you that don’t believe in the divine, you should get into your car right now, travel to your local grocer and purchase some goat cheese. As part of our Christmas celebration, we sat in front of the TV eating meat, cheese, and crackers. Now when the goat cheese touched my tongue God…

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  • Shrongs -Part II

    This is a piece of fiction from about four years ago…one of my favorites that was never featured on Alarmingly Strange Stories or www.theweirdcrap.com. Which seems sort of odd in retrospect, since I run both. Hope you like part II of “Shrongs” So now it was my turn to go to that string dimension thing……

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  • The Journey To HR, Part 110!

    “Where am I?” Bob asked after he was done with the belching, groaning and flatulence. The HR lady walked over to him and looked down. “IN MY OFFICE!” she declared. Bob tried to get up but she pushed him back down with a foot. “Why?” he asked. It must have been the way he asked…

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