The Weird Crap is a weekly publication featuring Alarmingly Strange Stories, Bizarre Columns, Memes and Comics!

Strange Stories

Published Bi-Weekly:

Excerpts of the latest fiction submitted by our visitors…

>>>THE LATEST FICTION

  • “The New Job” by Rance Treakle
    by Rance Treakle
    [A Halloween Special from the 2003 Archives] I thought the devil was red and had a tail. I had braced myself for His appearance, His style, even His odor if need be. So what happens when I call Him? He shows up at my door in a three-piece suit, looking like a successful businessman. OK,…
  • THE MICROWAVED CHICKEN HEART
    by Craig Snyder
    The Microwaved Chicken Heart bellowed in triumph as his hideous six-inch fangs tore through the President’s colon. The Chief Executive shrieked in agony; his hopes for a pleasant Wednesday shattered in a few bloody moments. “I don’t believe I’m going to be re-elected,” he whimpered brokenly. The day had dawned so calm and fresh, like…
  • AND THERE WAS LIGHT
    by Chris Harris
    By Chris Harris We as a race, were the essence of eternity. But there was only ever one race, which like time itself was both infinite and finite. All creatures and all time were merely parts of their respective wholes. For as a second might regard a minute as impossible, so does the cell of…
  • Infinite Being — by Dovin Melhee
    by dovinmelhee
    Infinite Being By Dovin Melhee ————— There was an infinite being. Infinite in ability. Infinite in power. Infinite in knowledge. Infinite in intelligence. Infinite in possibility. Infinite and limitless in everything. The being considered itself and was satisfied that it was limitless, perfect and complete. But then the impossible happened. The being thought of something…

Columns

Updated Weekly:

Blogs? Columns? Fiction?
Whatever, here’s some excerpts!

>>>NEW THIS WEEK

  • The Song in Bob’s Head
    by Spamrider
  • You Better You Bet
    by Spamrider
    You can literally bet on almost anything now.  And I’m not using “literally” in that post-ironic sense where literally means literally the opposite of itself. You can literally literally bet on almost anything. From a Time Traveller’s historian perspective, I see it all as a part of the continued Game and Reality Show-ification of American…
  • The Journey To HR, Part 116!
    by Stephen Johnson
    Suddenly, Bob sat up. The applause and my crying stopped. He looked at me. “We made a movie about 60 or 70 years ago,” he said. “Do you remember that?” I nodded. “We had a couple Betamax players and hooked them together. Then we got some cheap beer, think it was Keystone, and, since it…
  • The Squealing of the Pigs, Part 10!
    by Bob Senitram
    By Bob SenitramBringing the nonsense to light… That night, Cannibal Hector escaped. A daring escape involving cunning, patience, blood, gore, and the eating of faces. Not really. Actually, he leaned against a wall and that got the whole ball rolling. It was the shoddy construction that went into the temporary prison. It was made-on-the-cheap years…

Memes

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Comics

Bunch more here!

Random Strange Stories

  • Going bananas

    “I’m afraid, Mr. Smith, that your monkey has cancer,” the vet informed me. “Cancer?” I echoed. “Poor CoCo.” Poor Coco nothing. Poor me was more like it. The damn baboon was a pain in the ass from the get go. And I’d trained my fair share of animals in the past to know a troublemaker…

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  • Tasteless Joe

    Joseph Mellon appeared like all the other babies in the sandbox. He was cute and cuddly and round and happy; happy eating sand, that is. Oh sure, babies are famous for sticking just about anything in their mouths, but little Joey wasn’t simply tasting the sand, he was eating it as if it were the…

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  • A Cream Filled Existence

    5 Pages I watched his pudgy face devour the ho-ho. The cream filled kind. The tubby little man did not even stop to savor the ho-ho; I wasn’t even sure he was enjoying it. He didn’t love the ho-ho. I loved the ho-ho. He just ate them; like a savage. “Hey pal,” I said, making…

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  • Fear: Held Against My Will

           Fear will make you do things you would not ordinarily do, I know.  This tragic tale happened eight months ago.     I use to think that if I moved to an expensive neighborhood, it would be a safer place to live.  A picturesque location where soccer-moms drove their kids to a private school every morning,…

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Random Columns From Years Gone By

  • A Quest For An Answer: Part 3

    Black Country Communion—2 MoTW—Conquest Thinking it was gun, I ducked and then bobbed and weaved for awhile,figuring (yet again) that he wouldn’t be stable enough to hit somethingthat was ducking, bobbing and weaving. When no gunshots rang out, I stopped my ducking, bobbing and weaving andtook in the scene. There was Bob, muttering “Unnnngh” and…

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  • Rescued!!!

    It turns out, that Stephen read last week’s column and decided to take action! This would be the second time he saved my life. Don’t get me wrong, Stephens quite the asshole, but I do owe him my life. Now two times over! Many years ago, in the dead of winter, I thought it would…

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  • So Why Does Bob HAVE To Vote Trump?

    This column won’t make any sense unless you read last week’s column first, “Bob Commits Votes for Trump…AGAIN!!!“ “So, what’s the deal?” Bel asks. “Well, back in 2016 Trump had a “get the vote out” campaign which targeted independents.” I explain. “Yeah?…” “Some of the volunteers were actually paid escorts who were instructed to use…

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  • The Journey To HR, Part 33!

    “Yep,” I said. “Have a seat and let me tell you about that day……” The HR lady sat down and Star Child Two just hung there. I told them about that day. When I was done they sat in silence. They were awed. So was I, just remembering that joke. See, it’s quite funny especially…

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  • Our First Column of Chick Shit without Melissa!

    Well, here we go. A new era has begun. With the death of Melissa, we asked for you, our wonderful, loyal reader, to go ahead and send us a commentary. And, boy, did we ever receive a few. It took us minutes to read them all and pick the best. So, read on. Hi. My…

    Read More….

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