The Weird Crap is a weekly publication featuring Alarmingly Strange Stories, Bizarre Columns, Memes and Comics!

Strange Stories

Published Bi-Weekly:

Excerpts of the latest fiction submitted by our visitors…

>>>THE LATEST FICTION

  • History of a Hot Sauce: The mysterious Origins of Wassabassco
    by R. Andrew Heidel
    by R. Andrew Heidel and William Morton Our recipe, and Kiki’s lineage, begins in Japan during the waning years of the Edo era when the Tokugawa Shogunate commissioned the Sushi Sensei to discover a wasabi hot enough for the emperor himself. After many years on his dangerous quest, the Sushi Sensei discovered a pure strain…
  • River People
    by Andy Henion
    -Strange – 2 Pages – As far as I can tell there are two types of Tennessee river people and they travel in competing packs and consume washed up fish or this ubiquitous leafy vegetation that I with my northern bearings will only later come to know as kudzu. There are the stoop-shouldered people who…
  • How Roger Hambone Missed His Big Chance
    by Randy Bone
    Roger Hambone despite his last name never learned to hambone. He was hamboneless. But he could eef like nobody’s business. People used to say his name should have been Roger Eef. They called him “Eefin’ Roger Hambone”. When he would eef it sounded like this: Ah ee, ah oh, ah ee, ah oh, [hic], ee,…
  • DABBLING IN THE DEPTHS OF HER SOUL
    by Evgeniya Seizova
    by Evgeniya Seizova Year by year a beautiful young lady was gazing with Her spiritual eyes in her own destruction… Was she a human being anymore? She stared her tired and too dilated pupils once again in the impassable Darkness trying to find a ray of light. So many impossible efforts. They’ve been crushing and…

Columns

Updated Weekly:

Blogs? Columns? Fiction?
Whatever, here’s some excerpts!

>>>NEW THIS WEEK

  • Official Presidential Statement
    by Spamrider
    In lieu of this week’s edition of Spamrider of the Apocalypse TheWeirdCrap.com has been forced asked to provide the following Presidential statement: The failing LOW RATINGS weirdcrap.com is nothing but a LOSER website run by seditious losers who HATE AMERICA. Little Bob Semitram and his so-called “writers” (who all suffer from TDS) are a bunch…
  • The Journey To HR, Part 107!
    by Stephen Johnson
    Bob stopped eating the paste and looked at the HR lady in horror. I smiled. “I was doing some further reading and there’s more…..punishment that needs to be done,” the HR lady said, smiling back at me. “Oh?” I asked. She motioned to Star Child Two and it flew over to her. She whispered something…
  • Back to the USSA?
    by Bob Senitram
    By Bob SenitramThinking up the nonsense, and then some… Last week in my column about the USSA, I was explainin’ why I thing things have gone awry in this once great country of ours.Now I continue… Back in the day, I used to vote Republican once in a while. All depended on if I felt…
  • Time Portal
    by Spamrider
    By the grace of Herman I finally somehow managed to rig up an elementary time portal. I know it doesn’t look like much.  But it’s a start.  And it works. And here’s how it works. (This is going to get complicated, so buckle up and settle in…) That door you see in the picture leads…

Memes

Click here for the whole batch!

Comics

Bunch more here!

Random Strange Stories

  • “The New Job” by Rance Treakle

    [A Halloween Special from the 2003 Archives] I thought the devil was red and had a tail. I had braced myself for His appearance, His style, even His odor if need be. So what happens when I call Him? He shows up at my door in a three-piece suit, looking like a successful businessman. OK,…

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  • TOLD YOU SO

    I Told You So by Steve Wilkins -Strange – 3 Pages – Penfold Stekins (or Smiley as he was known, or rather had been known, to his close friends) had no idea whether it was night or day. No idea of the date. No idea of anything much really. He only knew one thing. Spiders.…

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  • Strings Attached

    She has been fighting it for weeks now, the broody, hungry emotion that came to her when it was past time to have a man. She had ignored the feeling as long as she could because she didn’t want it. She had never liked the consequences of fulfillment but her body would not listen to intellectual…

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  • Life After Life

    by Colin Blalock If you died, and after you were already dead someone said, “excuse me sir/ma’am, you’re dead”, what would be the first thing that came to mind that you wish you had done before you died? Me, I wish I had sailed around the world. It sounds far fetched, but I wanted nothing…

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Random Columns From Years Gone By

  • War on Christmas?

    God: “Hey Saint Garion, what the fuck is all this war on Christmas shit about? People down there are just going on and on about this Christmas thing…” Saint Garion: “Well it is this ‘holy’ day that the folks down here just sort of passed into law that is supposed to be in remembrance of…

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  • Blah, Blah…

    This is one of those weeks where I haven’t had time to think about what I want to write (YES! I do think about it!) So lets just babble on about some random things. I have been thinking about what I want for my birthday, it’s 9/11…. I know what you’re thinking, and it has…

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  • A Special Holiday “Thank You” Column (Sort of)

    Tipton, Entwistle & Powell—“Edge of the World” MoTW—“Clerks II” Not surprisingly, no word back from Britney or her camp yet. Part of methought that maybe Paris knows and is holding her back from getting intouch with me, but another part of me knows that she’s too stupid toread so I’ll be patient for a while…

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  • Robbie.

    Robbie. By P.S.Gifford Robbie studied his metallic face in the mirror. He looked intently as the face staring back at him. “I am such a fine looking robot,’ he thought, “surely the finest the world has ever seen. He trundled to a black lacquered book case and gazed at the books. His eyes fell on…

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  • The Journey To HR, Part 101!

    The HR lady opened her mouth as if to speak, but was interrupted by Bob. “What I said was ‘chickens are clumsy, dimwitted, filthy, stupid, poop-eating bastards…just like Stephen Johnson,’ hidey ho!” he said, before giving me another wink. Then he leaned towards me. “That’s a ropey-dope you astronomical mutha-fucka you!” he whispered quite loudly.…

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