The Weird Crap is a weekly publication featuring Alarmingly Strange Stories, Bizarre Columns, Memes and Comics!

Strange Stories

Published Bi-Weekly:

Excerpts of the latest fiction submitted by our visitors…

>>>THE LATEST FICTION

  • Ziontology
    by Mikel Davis
    By Mikel Davis “You slimy sack of fish shit!” Deputy Ploggard slammed his hairy fist down onto the grey metal table which separated the two men. His hand landed with such force that it left a fist-shaped dent in the middle of the table. The noise which followed echoed off…
  • “The New Job” by Rance Treakle
    by Rance Treakle
    [A Halloween Special from the 2003 Archives] I thought the devil was red and had a tail. I had braced myself for His appearance, His style, even His odor if need be. So what happens when I call Him? He shows up at my door in a three-piece suit, looking like a successful businessman. OK,…
  • THE MICROWAVED CHICKEN HEART
    by Craig Snyder
    The Microwaved Chicken Heart bellowed in triumph as his hideous six-inch fangs tore through the President’s colon. The Chief Executive shrieked in agony; his hopes for a pleasant Wednesday shattered in a few bloody moments. “I don’t believe I’m going to be re-elected,” he whimpered brokenly. The day had dawned so calm and fresh, like…
  • AND THERE WAS LIGHT
    by Chris Harris
    By Chris Harris We as a race, were the essence of eternity. But there was only ever one race, which like time itself was both infinite and finite. All creatures and all time were merely parts of their respective wholes. For as a second might regard a minute as impossible, so does the cell of…

Columns

Updated Weekly:

Blogs? Columns? Fiction?
Whatever, here’s some excerpts!

>>>NEW THIS WEEK

  • Stupid
    by Spamrider
    People say this is the stupidest timeline and truth be told they aren’t that far off from being correct. But there is at least one even stupider*.  I know because I got stuck in it one time. Now at this point you may be thinking to yourself, “This guy sure gets himself stuck in a…
  • The Journey To HR, Part 118!
    by Stephen Johnson
    The HR lady looked down at Bob. “You want what?” she asked. “New feets!” Bob said, pointing at his feetless legs. She mumbled and grumbled as she walked over to her desk and picked up the phone. A few minutes later, a door flew open and a group of uniformed workers strolled in, surrounded Bob,…
  • The Squealing of the Pigs, Part 12!
    by Bob Senitram
    By Bob SenitramThinking up the nonsense…I think… In a peaceful Tennessee home sits 90 year old man, drinking a nice cup of caffeine free tea while flipping thru his high school year book from 19-somthing-or-another. He comes to the picture of one of his friends who has long since passed. “Look at that, dead for…
  • 1984
    by Spamrider
    I once jumped back to the year 1984 and met myself as a young man. I don’t know why I did it.  I haven’t even done it yet. I just remember this old man coming up to me and asking me for a smoke. “I don’t smoke,” I told him. “That’s ok,” he said.  “Neither…

Memes

Click here for the whole batch!

Comics

Bunch more here!

Random Strange Stories

  • Morning Bells

    Some days, especially Sunday, no one comes in. If I didn’t work here, neither would I. I find Sundays especially gloomy – but I don’t know why. The sun could be shining, and the world would open wide with a smile, and I would say, “Dude, tomorrow’s Monday. Since I work Sundays, my week runs…

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  • Sepulchural

    -Strange Category – 5 Pages “Howdie.” Looking up from the gas pump nozzle, Vincent was greeted by a plummeting red boxing glove to the face. Whump! Vincent stumbled from the strike and fell against his ’87 yellow Trans-Am. “My nose!” The attacker danced back and forth, concealing his identity behind the big, red boxing gloves.…

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  • Going bananas

    “I’m afraid, Mr. Smith, that your monkey has cancer,” the vet informed me. “Cancer?” I echoed. “Poor CoCo.” Poor Coco nothing. Poor me was more like it. The damn baboon was a pain in the ass from the get go. And I’d trained my fair share of animals in the past to know a troublemaker…

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  • Don’t Give Up Your Day Job

    He’s lugging this suitcase, the first time I see him. It’s a huge brown monstrosity, this suitcase, and probably weighs more than its contents. He’s covered it with stickers of the places that he’s been, like he needs to reassure himself of his past, to check he actually exists. I can dig that. We all…

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Random Columns From Years Gone By

  • Out Top Ten (or so) Movies of 2008

    Ayreon—-01011001 MoTW—An American Carol Well, it's a new year and it's that time for me to let our faithfulfollowing know what movies we found to be the best of the past year(that being 2008 for those not in the know). This year I managed to leave the house and see a whopping two movies inthe…

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  • Chick-ish Shit

    I’d like to take this week’s column to call attention to the fact that we currently have a United States President who publically said to a woman, “Quiet, piggy.” Now I know that’s old news at this point, and that he’s undoubtedly said and done countless more vile and despicable things since then, but let’s…

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  • Soccer Moms

    It amazes me that everyone is worried about Elian, Microsoft, if God is real, will Oprah get really, really fat again, etc., when there is a more serious problem that plagues normal people every day of their life: Those bitches in the minivans. These so called “soccer moms” have no business being on the road,…

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  • Fessin’ Up

    Ok, people. I’m afraid I have a confession to make. I know it’s going to come as quite a shock to all of you, but it’s something that’s been eating at me night and day, and I’m afraid if I don’t come clean my conscience isn’t ever going to let me live another day in…

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  • Those Stupid Things They Do Are Stupid

    I heard from someone somewhere about a new program or something that the kids today are posting moving pictures of them doing things and making other people join in the fun. So stupid! There’s one where people stack milk crates on top of each other and try to climb them without falling or getting seriously…

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