The History of Our Planet Part V

About 2 months ago, I set out to explain why dogs eat their own poo. Well, I’ll get to it.

I just got sidetracked, and explaining how I came to know the answer to that question required a bit of an explanation. If you’re coming in the middle of this movie, then here’s the links to the columns that lead up to this one.

History of Earth, Part I
History of Earth, Part II
History of Earth, Part III
History of the Dog Planet Part IV

Now, we’re on to part five!

As described in the History of the Dog Planet Part IV, the dog civilization was on the brink of total collapse. They wanted to kill all the Hairless apes, with nuclear napalm…and they did. Unfortunately, the napalm continued to burn until about 80% of all plant life on the planet was gone.

What was left was a fracture of the previous civilization with starvation being the leading cause of death. In what was left of the government, pup scientist started working on a way to save their civilization.

Now, with the aid of my guide, I have materialized into that very lab where final testing is about to commence…

“So doc, lemme get this right. We inject pups with this and they can convert anything that gets in their stomach into a source of energy?” I ask.

“Exactly!” The pup with a lab coat and glasses responds.

“So, anything? Rocks, sticks, dirt…anything will be converted to energy?”

“Yes! No more reliance on plants, animals or anything…if you can pick it up, you can eat it!”

“We’ve been searching for some sunshine…” I reply.

“That’s all I ever need.” He replies.

“So how are you going to inject each pup over generations? Doesn’t seem possible.” I reply.

“You don’t, this is a DNA snippet that plasmids will inject into each pups cells. The DNA sequence will create the protein that will digest anything. Once it’s in their DNA, future generations will be born with the protein. We just have to give as many injections as we can, and those pups and their offspring will never starve.” The pup scientist explained.

“Genius!” I replied.

“I know, right?” He replied.

“Over here…” My guide, that only I can see directs.

“Whaaa?”

“Follow me.” He says as he heads toward an elevator.

“Ok…”

AND NOW YOU KNOW!

Song in my head:

COMING NEXT: A Strange Trip Indeed!

Bob Senitram

Webmaster and editor of TheWeirdcrap.com. I obtained a bachelor's degree in micro-biology around the turn of the century but was quickly tracked down and forced to return it to its rightful owner and pay a $25 fine. *** A fan of science fiction, I started this website in 1999 as a portal for science fiction stories that have never been published. *** Completely devoid of talent, I decided to call on the public to supply content. Shortly afterwards Stephen and I started writing weekly columns and have continued to this day.

http://TheWeirdcrap.com

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