Last Minute, Last Supper for Gentiles!

Thomas from Boston:
Bob, I want to do more than hide Easter eggs this season. Any ideas for what will make this Easter special?

Bob writes:
I assume you got kids ‘cause of the Easter egg reference. I got two, Baby Gurl one who’s almost five and Baby Gurl two who’s almost a year.

Them kids can keep you busy I’ll tell you what!

The ol’ lady’s out of town for business and I’ve keepin’ ‘em fed and clothed all by myself. Tonight, Baby Gurl two is asleep by 8pm, and Baby Gurl one is shuttled off to bed by 8:30. She stalls for a full hour before she’s in bed. Meanwhile, I clean the kitchen and get five bottles ready , three for daycare on Monday, one for when she wakes up in the middle of the night and one for the morning.

Then Baby Gurl one likes juice in the morning in a sippy-cup. So I pour that and put it in the fridge ‘cause right now I got two hands and in the morning the other arm will be full of Baby. Then I put cheerio’s in a baggy as a snack in the car for Baby Gurl one. Am I ready yet?

Nope, I put a box of puffs in the diaper bag ‘cause Baby Gurl two has a runny nose and the Kleenex at daycare is made of recycled wood chips and it really does a number on her nose. Then I put in her “blankey” for nap time in the bag and I’m good to go…almost.

The diaper hamper thingy needs changed on Sunday’s or it’ll stink up the whole house (we don’t keep it in here room, its in the hall). I change the bag and disinfect the hamper with Lysol, that’s the only way to get the stink out.

So I start all this at 8:30 pm, now it’s 10:15 pm and I’m just starting the blog. By the time I finish it and post it it’ll be 11:00 pm and I’ll be getting’ up in the middle of the night at least once, then I’m up at 6:00 am.

Something to think about the next time you decide to get it on with yo ol’ lady.

Anyways, about Easter, rather than eating fish on Friday’s or starving, I suggest a good ol’ fashioned last supper. But if you got kid’s like mine, who has the time? This is where my last minute last supper comes in handy. It’s a quick way to celebrate that last meal before Jesus was turned in!

First the disciples were poor, so they probably ate poor food like rice and beans, then they scooped it up with unleavened bread. This is really easy to reproduce.

First get some no-name brand instant rice and cook it, it takes ten minutes.

Then get some pork n’ beans and heat it in the microwave for two minutes in a microwave safe container.

Next, since unleavened bread is basically a tortilla, get some tortilla’s and microwave then for about two minutes. Note: get a damp paper towel and put it on top of the tortilla’s…it’ll keep ‘em moist.

Put a heap of beans on top of the rice and eat it with tortilla’s while wearing toga’s.

There you have it, a last supper in just fifteen minutes!

And now you know.

COMING NEXT: Finally a new story!

Bob Senitram

Webmaster and editor of TheWeirdcrap.com. I obtained a bachelor's degree in micro-biology around the turn of the century but was quickly tracked down and forced to return it to its rightful owner and pay a $25 fine. *** A fan of science fiction, I started this website in 1999 as a portal for science fiction stories that have never been published. *** Completely devoid of talent, I decided to call on the public to supply content. Shortly afterwards Stephen and I started writing weekly columns and have continued to this day.

http://TheWeirdcrap.com

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