I Ruin Bob’s Starla Story (Because I Can)

I want to ruin Bob’s story about Starla and tell you what happened to her.

It probably won’t ruin his whole story, but the end will most definitely be ruined.

It’s really sad since she hadn’t mastered how to ride an escalator. They had been around for awhile, but they finally came to Omaha around the late 50’s. This was before any safety devices were needed since the people that overlooked escalators didn’t think they were needed.

She was fumbling her way up an escalator one summer day and didn’t realize that she needed to step off at the top and of course she was devoured by the machine. Tons of blood and pieces of her new blue gingham dress flew every which way, with the most damage done to the Buster Brown store at the top of the escalator. They had to shut down for a few days in order to clean their windows and get a new Buster Brown sign.

Other than that, the main change made was to slow down the escalator. It was previously thought that folks wanted to get to the next floor REALLY quick, but after Starla screwed it up for everyone, it was slowed down a lot.

Now, for some reason, every time Bob hears “There Is A Light That Never Goes Out”, he breaks down in a really humorous way. I really don’t understand since if she had a light, it most definitely went out that day.
Stephen Johnson

The idea of building a website with Bob came from Stephen in the days of message boards and chat rooms. We settled on the name TheWeirdcrap.com and the rest is history. Retired since he hit the ripe age of 25, he spends most his time doing odd-jobs around the house and digging thru trash bins for "stuff that's still good." Stephen has contributed several short stories and hosted the "Lunatic Ravings" column since the beginning (1999). The idea of writing weekly columns came from Stephen before blogs or blog sites ever existed. So, I guess that makes him THE FIRST BLOGGER IN THE WORLD!!!


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