Bob pointed at me.
“You! You I remember,” he said, giving another evil laugh.
“Gosh. Really?” I responded, getting a little bit bored with this whole thing.
“When I was in kindergarten, I used to chase you home every day. You lived down the street from me. I have no idea how it all got started, but I thought we were just playing a chasing game, but it turns out you were afraid of me and you ran home every day being terrorized by me…TERRORIZED! I had no idea you were running in fear, I just thought it was a game. Then one day I caught you. I didn’t know what to do next! Next thing I know…”
Now I remembered.
I was no longer bored with this whole thing.
Bob laughed.
“Yep, I caught you that day. Pushed you to the ground I did. You looked up at me, scared. Scared beyond belief! I thought it was funny, you lying there on the ground, eyes wide with the fear. Then, something came over me. Yes it did!”
Bob cackled and continued cackling as that day came flooding back into my mind.
“Do you remember now?” he asked between his cackling.
“Yes,” I said softly, knowing the tears would soon be flowing.
“I had that cricket bat. I had no idea what it was supposed to be used for, but it was mighty useful when I went out badger hunting. Bashed them with that bat and we had good eatin’ for a full week!”
I could only listen knowing what was to come.
“I made you turn over. I wasn’t going to bash you over the head with that bat, oh no. I had something better planned. You tried to get up, but I was too powerful now. Sure, I was a wee, tiny child but I had strong legs from all that badger hunting and used one of ’em to push you and keep you on the ground. Then, I took that bat, raised it as high as I could and with all my wee midget might I shoved that bat directly into your…”
I could take it no more.
I kicked Bob in the head.
When the applause started, I began crying.
Lunatic Ravings is posted each Saturday.
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