“This IS the way,” Bob replied.
“THIS….is the way,” replied the HR lady.
So, this I accepted and died I did.
Soon after, I opened my eyes.
It was quite foggy and I was quite wet from what felt like rain.
“Is this the afterlife?” I asked nobody in particular.
I walked forward a step or two and slammed into something solid.
It felt like glass.
“Glass in the afterlife?” I asked nobody else but me.
I heard something like a door opening.
The fog cleared.
Standing before me was Bob, wearing a blue satin nightgown.
“Good morning!” I said, now noticing that I was standing in a shower and that it wasn’t fog but mist.
Shower mist.
Bob shrieked.
I froze and words suddenly appeared before me, as if they were end credits to a tv show.
Then there was a ripping/popping sound.
I was back in the HR office.
The HR lady was glaring, not at me, but at Bob.
He was still shrieking and still wearing the blue satin nightgown.
“Stop shrieking and cover your bony ass with these,” she said, tossing a pair of bib overalls his way.
As his shrieks turned to sobs, this he did.
But not before we squirted him with motor oil.
Then we set him on fire.
Lunatic Ravings is posted each Saturday.
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