The New War

Dear Bel,

As you know I am having some trouble deciding how America should fight this new war. Any suggestions?

-Mr. Bush

Dear Mr. Bush,

Send aircraft to Afghanistan that the natives will not recognize. Abduct and mutilate their people by the thousands. Concentrate on the ones surrounding their holy places. This will lead them to believe that God or Allah is angry with them. Then if the aircraft are discovered on US soil, say that God is with us, and that you will hand her over if they can prove that is was God who attacked them.

-Bel

More Psycho Sermons

Saint Garion

Bel Garion, who also goes by the name Saint Garion started writing columns in our early years and continued to 2006. He often refers to "The Lord" and "Buddah" which are the names of his dogs which speak to him on a regular basis.

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