Married for 6 Years

Dear Bel,

My husband and I have been married for 6 years. When we married, we decided we didn’t want any children and I had my tubes tied. Now he suddenly wants kids. He seems to have forgotten that I had the operation.

Bel, I want to remind him but the sex has been incredible and I am afraid of what he will do when he remembers. He is obsessed. What should I do?


Dear Tied,

On the way home, buy a pig. Set it loose in the house and the demon possessing your husband will go into it. Kill the pig and enjoy a nice pork dinner. Shame on you. I know that you were aware that you were copulating with a demon. You thought it was great until the runes started bleeding through. Next time think about the feelings and needs of your husband and put them ahead of your own perverse sexual desires.


More Psycho Sermons

Saint Garion

Bel Garion, who also goes by the name Saint Garion started writing columns in our early years and continued to 2006. He often refers to "The Lord" and "Buddah" which are the names of his dogs which speak to him on a regular basis.

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