A Cold Medicine that Works!

Dear Bel,

Recently I came down with a really bad cold. I felt like my brain was trying to crawl out of my nose. A friend of mine recommended Robitussin CF, so I tried it. Within 2 minutes all the mucus was completely gone!

Where did it all go Bel?


Dear Stacy,

The makers of Robitussin made a pact with the devil. They wanted to make a drug that actually works and did not want to sell their souls to do it (unlike the makers of NY-QUIL). The deal was that they would provide the devil with a constant supply of fresh mucus in return for the product. If you look at the active ingredients you find the term “Guaifenesin”, which is actually a scrambled Atlantian phrase, “Sine ega funi”, which roughly translated means, “The only sacrifice that son of a bitch is getting from us is our piss, shit, and ooze.”

Hope this helps.


COMING NEXT: Next weeks column!

More Psycho Sermons

Saint Garion

Bel Garion, who also goes by the name Saint Garion started writing columns in our early years and continued to 2006. He often refers to "The Lord" and "Buddah" which are the names of his dogs which speak to him on a regular basis.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.


Enjoyed this? Please spread the word :)