The 2012 Roadtrip All In One Sitting!

Lunatic Ravings!
by Stephen Johnson

Testament—Dark Roots Of Earth

MoTW—[REC] 2

Well, another roadtrip is done. Luckily for you, I don’t have to waste a couple months explaining what went on.

Why?

Because absolutely nothing happened. Nothing happened on the way to Delaware, nothing happened in Delaware and nothing happened on the way back from Delaware. However, during our stay in DE I did manage to sleep for about 12 hours (almost) straight. That didn’t please the woman or housekeeping, but fuck ’em. I was on “vacation”.

The one thing I did want to do, I did. Thanks to my adopted brother, we did find a beach that was away from the hordes of vacationers. There were maybe 25 people tops on the beach we found. I now consider this MY vacation spot so cannot and will not give the name. I have dubbed this place “Roadkill Beach”.

The day we found this beach I was on a quest. A quest to find a beach with a bar so I could drink and stare at the water. We found Roadkill Beach but there wasn’t any bar. There was a little general store and when I asked the cashier if there was a bar nearby or even on the beach, she said “I wish”. Then a huge woman oozed over to her and said that there wasn’t a bar on the beach or even nearby and that she couldn’t stand drunk people anyway, because all they’d do is come in and mess with her store.

I don’t know if this behemoth of a woman was the cashiers mother or something, but the cashier immediately clammed up when the large one spoke. Yep, clammed up and wouldn’t say another word to charming  moi. That kind of hurt my feeling quite terribly so I told my group that we were leaving and would never, ever, ever come back to this store again. The large woman didn’t care.

So we ended up on Rehoboth Beach and the throngs of vacationers, but did visit the same bar as last year and I was able to drink my fill while staring at the ocean. Even bought someone who had turned 21 that day a drink, but she didn’t thank charming ole moi. I’m sensing a pattern here.

Other than that, nothing happened. Pretty damn weak vacation, but something a weak vacation is just the thing.

Hey, guess what? I’ve joined Facebook finally. I have no friends, except for that guy in California who sent me a friend request about two minutes after I had signed up. Some might find that weird, but I find it to be a way to build a base of friends. Tried to find Bob, but he’s to chicken to get a Facebook account.

And that’s all I have. Check out the video of “The Skinny” on the main page. It’s funny shit!

COMING NEXT: I update you on how many friends I have on FB!

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