It Is Summer!

So it’s summer right now in my part of the world and I am having a pretty good time of it. More people have been keeping my company of late, mostly because I have a strong following in the homosexual community. Young straight men hang around trying to sleep with the lesbian women and straight women seem to clutter around the gay men for no particular reason. But as I said, the gay community likes to hear that they are accepted and forgiven, so they have been the first group to open their hearts and follow me.

One of them is a pretty powerful local politician. He considers himself humble, devout, and straight, so one day I decided to enlighten him when he asked, “What is arrogance according to Bel?”

I turned and placed my fist soundly into his chin. While he was on the floor I reached into his broken mouth and pulled out his tongue and led him around the room, speaking to him as if he were a dog. “You stupid bitch!” I yelled. I let go of his tongue and he stood tall as if he were about to strike back at me. He was very angry. “Your arrogance is showing at this moment. I am more than twice your size…” He took a swing.

He woke up in a truck stop ‘shower’ room with his pants around his ankles. He is much happier now. He is still straight. Many of the women in our little group seem to be after him now. I think it’s because they know he has taken it up the ass. I guess they respect that sort of thing. And that’s what it’s all about, making people happy.

More Psycho Sermons

Saint Garion

Bel Garion, who also goes by the name Saint Garion started writing columns in our early years and continued to 2006. He often refers to "The Lord" and "Buddah" which are the names of his dogs which speak to him on a regular basis.

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