He Doesn’t Step In For Me…….

So, it snowed here.

Figured I might as well make myself useful and shovel a path on the driveway and the sidewalk leading to the front door since I’m expecting a package or two from Amazon.

But, I couldn’t find my snow shovelin’ gloves!

Asked the woman where they were and she asked if she was the keeper of my gloves which is kind of what I expected so have no clue now why I even asked.

The only other option I had was to call Jerome and have him come over to do the shovelin’.

“You do realize that I’m a few states away from you and I still haven’t taken out my winter clothes?”

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

“You do know that you can buy gloves on the way over, right?”

He thought about that for awhile and then came up with the old, “But how am I going to get there? My scooter is in the shop and the canker sores on my knees make it quite difficult do do any long walking.”

Of course I mentioned the company helicopter but…..

“Oh, I took that apart looking for scooter parts. Those parts are different than what I need and I haven’t had time to put it back together due to the paralyzing inflammation of my elbows.”

We were getting nowhere and Amazon could show up at anytime.

“I also have to write Bob’s column again even though he’ll probably claim that he wrote it. Had to do the same thing a day or so ago and that takes top priority over everything. Even my bloody mouth sores.”

I hung up.

Grabbed my boots and walked a path to the front door.

Hopefully the delivery driver has smaller feet than moi.

Need my vitamins.

More Lunatic Ravings…

Read a new Lunatic Ravings every Saturday!

Stephen Johnson

The idea of building a website with Bob came from Stephen in the days of message boards and chat rooms. We settled on the name TheWeirdcrap.com and the rest is history. Retired since he hit the ripe age of 25, he spends most his time doing odd-jobs around the house and digging thru trash bins for "stuff that's still good." Stephen has contributed several short stories and hosted the "Lunatic Ravings" column since the beginning (1999). The idea of writing weekly columns came from Stephen before blogs or blog sites ever existed. So, I guess that makes him THE FIRST BLOGGER IN THE WORLD!!!

https://theweirdcrap.com

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