by Stephen Johnson
While farting around on the internet looking for a local Little Caesar’s because I had an urge for 3 1/2 feet of bacon, I visited Metsblog and noticed something very interesting.
Someone mentioned “Lunatic Ravings”!
Ok, it wasn’t a mention of this blog (or column or waste of space or a spot for stupid rants on stupid stuff), but those two words were mentioned, “lunatic” being the first word followed by “ravings”. Not ‘lunatic raving”. There was an “s” added to the end of “raving”. I read it a couple times just to make sure and it was definitely “lunatic ravings”.
Was this a reader of this……….THING that is posted every once in awhile? Is it a Mets fan that is actually a fan of me? I’d like to think so. If it’s just coincidence, the whole meaning of my life would be shot. I want to think that one person out there would appreciate me.
Some would think that the woman would appreciate me. However, that’s not the case especially when I laughed when she tried to put the right show on her left foot this morning. She didn’t find any humor in that and hasn’t spoken to me since. Even when we were at Wal Mart, she didn’t say a word. She did throw packages of marked-down hamburger at me which would have been amusing, but the person working in the meat department didn’t even crack a smile at my pain, nor did they thank me for cleaning up the mess. They were very serious about their job and didn’t like our shenanigans, I guess.
As I wrote that, I remembered that there’s a giant pink ball in the backyard. I have no idea where it came from.
That reminds me of the time the woman complained that there was water pouring out of the gutter outside her office. Even with my fear of heights, I climbed a ladder to see what the problem was and discovered a tennis ball was blocking the drain at the end of the gutter which caused the water to pour over. Guaranteed it was tossed up there by one of the neighborhood kids, probably the same fuckers that rang the doorbell and ran a few years ago.
That reminds me that one of the brackets holding up the gutter over the garage is broken and I need to figure out how to fix it. Or, like last year, I’ll just let it go.
The people that live across the street have moved. Now we wait and see who will be our new neighbors. Doesn’t mean we’ll talk to them. In the 10+ years we’ve lived here, , I believe I spoke maybe two sentences to the now-departed occupants. I have no idea why I brought that up, but I think the paragraph above this one reminded me of something.
I finished my binge watch of “The X-Files”. Now the show is coming back for a six episode run. Who could of imagined that?
Now I’m done. My one possible fan has something new to read!
COMING NEXT: I didn’t go to my prom, neither should you