The Journey To HR, Part 29!

“Know what?” I asked as I placed the crazy wig on my bleeding head.

“I don’t know?” asked the HR lady.

“Is that a question? Do you really not know? A minute ago it seemed that you DID know and now you’re acting like maybe you do know, but there’s also that possibility that you DON’T know and….say, do you have a stapler?”

What kind of HR lady do you think I am? Of course I have a stapler!”

She reached into her dress pocket and pulled out a stapler.

Since the wig didn’t want to stay on my wet head, I grabbed that stapler and stapled the heck out of it.

Sure, it hurt but what else was I to do?

“You know, if you waited a little bit the blood would start drying and get really sticky and you wouldn’t need to use that stapler.”

“Now you tell me?”

I tore the wig off.

Sure, it hurt but what else was I to do?

I stood there for about an hour and when the drops of blood slowed their plopping on the floor, I put the wig back on.

It stuck.

I jumped up and down and the wig stayed on.

I let myself eek out a happy fart.

Star Child Two floated down and inspected my wig.

“Say, you look kind of……sexy,” it said in a dreamy voice.

More Lunatic Ravings…

Read a new Lunatic Ravings every Saturday!

Stephen Johnson

The idea of building a website with Bob came from Stephen in the days of message boards and chat rooms. We settled on the name TheWeirdcrap.com and the rest is history. Retired since he hit the ripe age of 25, he spends most his time doing odd-jobs around the house and digging thru trash bins for "stuff that's still good." Stephen has contributed several short stories and hosted the "Lunatic Ravings" column since the beginning (1999). The idea of writing weekly columns came from Stephen before blogs or blog sites ever existed. So, I guess that makes him THE FIRST BLOGGER IN THE WORLD!!!

https://theweirdcrap.com

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