Big Jim Slade—This Is Delicious
And yet again, another year passes and another is here which means it's
that time again, time to see how my predictions for last year fared and
what I se coming up during this year.
So, let's check out my predictions for last year and see how I did.
Shall we? We shall!
1) A pseudo-star will choke to death on a Lego or vomit, neither
necessarily their own. (UPDATE: Is it possible that this actually
happened and we weren't told about it? There were some deaths, as usual,
so I'll take partial credit….0.5/9)
2) The Mets will not make it to the World Series. This is not reverse
psychology. Or is it? Really, it's not. Or am I lying? (UPDATE: 1.5/9)
3) I'll make it through my pile of 40+ unwrapped CD's, some of which
have been sitting there (yep, there) for almost three years. (UPDATE:
No, it didn't happen. I think it got larger. 1.5/9)
4) I'll get so sick of the word "change" that I'll accidentally slap a
cashier in a fit of rage. I'll spend a few days in jail. (UPDATE: Nope,
didn't happen either since I find that I do most shopping via the
internet. Bummer since it would have been fun. 1.5/9)
5) Biggest movie of the year will have at least one "i" in the title.
Yep, just like last year but different movie. (UPDATE: Yeah, way off on
this one. I was hoping it would fail too for some sick reason. 1.5/9)
6) Somewhere, a pen will run out of ink. The user of said pen will get
very angry. (UPDATE: I'm positive this happened somewhere. So, 2.5/9)
7) Aliens will land. They will thin out the herd. Driving around will be
easier. (UPDATE: They might have landed, but I didn't see the herd
thinning out. 3.0/9 because they could have landed and we just don't
know about it. Yet.)
8) A law will be passed which makes it legal to shoot those who don't
use their turn signals. This will thin out the herd even more. More food
and jobs for all. (UPDATE: The government was busy with the Cash For
Clunkers program so they didn't get around to this one. 3.0/9)
9) I'll take a road trip somewhere that'll amuse me but bore others.
(UPDATE: This did happen, much to my delight. What's even better is that
there were actually TWO trips last year and the second one was a beaut.
Trust me on that. 4.0/9)
So, less than half came true (or kinda true). Not bad, but not to good.
Remember, I'm not a professional, I'm just making educated/uneducated
With that disclaimer out of the way, let's look ahead to this year,
shall we? We shall!
9) The ending of "Lost" will pose more questions. Fanboys are delighted,
pissed and dumbfounded.
8) War. Not between countries but between a couple people. And it'll get
nasty. And it's already started, but it's not a full-fledged war yet.
7) Mets? No.
6) One of the funniest shows on the air will get cancelled.
5) One of the worst shows on the air won't.
4) Is he gay? That'll be the question about one of those contestants on
"American Idol". I won't care.
3) There'll be an arrest of someone "famous". We won't be shocked.
2) A chop-socky star will die. Don't know why this suddenly came to me,
but it's the same way I pick those winning lottery numbers.
1) Aerosmith will get a new lead singer. It'll be someone who doesn't
quite fit in and will be dragged off the stage and pummelled in the
middle of their opening night concert. His makeup will run due to all
the tears. He'll find solace in the arms of a young stagehand. I don't
know where this is going, but there's a motorcycle somewhere.
COMING NEXT: My writing gets worse, much to the disappointment of a