As I write this I am currently sitting in a hotel room in Big Lake, Texas. Never mind what year it is.
The name of the hotel is “The Derrick Inn”.
I call it “The Derelict Inn”.
It isn’t a bad hotel, really. It just has the misfortune of being located in a town that is totally out in the middle of nowhere. Big Lake may have a big lake, but despite being located in Texas that’s the only thing that’s big in Big Lake.
Apparently they used to measure towns by how many horses they had tied up at the local saloon. Hence the term “One Horse Town”. Nowadays I think you’re just supposed to replace the word “horse” with “stoplight”. Big Lake is a two stoplight town.
2,885 citizens inhabit Big Lake, Texas. According to the flier on the wall it has 11 churches. That’s one church for every 262 people. Not counting three heathens.
Of the eleven churches, three are Baptist, one is Catholic, one is Methodist, one is Pentecostal, and one is Mexican. They’ve also got your Apostolic, First Assembly, Church of Christ, and Faith Community churches.
If you’re Lutheran you have to drive to Rankin.
A new Spamrider of the Apocalypse each Sunday, and beyond!