So Monday I called Bob up and asked him when I was going to actually get paid for writing this column.
“You don’t get paid,” he said. “We don’t pay any of our writers.”
“You mean to tell me I’ve been doing this column now for the better part of 20 years and I don’t even get paid for it?” I asked, just to make sure I was actually hearing him correctly.
“You’ve only been doing this column for two weeks,” he said.
“That’s what you think,” I told him.
So now I’m thinking of maybe going out into the woods to look for that Chick Shit chick and see if maybe she doesn’t agree that perhaps it’s time for us WeirdCrap writers to exercise a little collective bargaining around here. After that if we can get Steve on board, which I’m pretty sure we can, then we’ll have him outnumbered.
Maybe we can even get that weird woman who’s always sitting around the office every time I stop by to badger Bob with questions about the website but so far as I’ve been able to tell all she ever does around there is paint her fingernails and I seriously doubt she can even type let alone write.
If Bob had any brains anyway he’d have already replaced the whole lot of us with an AI Writerbot by now just like all the real media organizations are doing so I figure we’ve got a pretty good chance of at least tricking him into giving us all some free coffee and donuts every once in awhile or maybe even some tickets to The Policeman’s Circus.
It’s been a long time since I’ve seen an actual real live Poodle.
