Guest Writers

Lunatic Columns, Blogs, Nonsense

We’ve been writing our columns since 1999!

Lunatic Ravings | Spamrider of the Apocalypse | Chick Shit | Crap Considered | Guest Writers | Column Archives

This page features recent samples of each writer.

Why are we obsessed with writing columns/stories that hardly anyone reads?
We don’t know.

But if you enjoy thought provoking opinions or serious literature, then you wandered down the wrong alley.
This is Tic Tok in written form.

What follows may include opinions disguised as facts, facts disguised as jokes, and bad writing disguised as fiction.

This garbage goes back to 1999 and is rarely seated in reality, which makes it timeless.
So pay a visit to the older stuff. It isn’t so much about reading about the world 20 years ago.
It’s more about what a knuckle headed freak of nature was thinkin about way back when.

Click the Archives link for a quarter century’s worth of gibberish that just might put a smile on your face.

Crap Considered

  • The Squealing of the Pigs, Part 13!
    by Bob Senitram
    By Bob SenitramThinking up the nonsense, and then some… Hopalong, aka Stephen burst thru the door with a gun pointed at the head of Bob’s trainer from the academy. “Nameless…
  • The Squealing of the Pigs, Part 12!
    by Bob Senitram
    By Bob SenitramThinking up the nonsense…I think… In a peaceful Tennessee home sits 90 year old man, drinking a nice cup of caffeine free tea while flipping thru his high…
  • The Squealing of the Pigs, Part 11!
    by Bob Senitram
    By Bob SenitramBringing the darkness to light…sort of. Later, in Dr. Benson’s office: “…and he just walked out. They found a dead tourist the next day, parts of his body…
  • The Squealing of the Pigs, Part 10!
    by Bob Senitram
    By Bob SenitramBringing the nonsense to light… That night, Cannibal Hector escaped. A daring escape involving cunning, patience, blood, gore, and the eating of faces. Not really. Actually, he leaned…
  • The Squealing of the Pigs, Part 9
    by Bob Senitram
    By Bob SenitramNon-stop nonsense for your reading pleasure… Previously, Dr. Benson heard about the warden’s deal with the Senator and sent Bob to meet with Dr. Hector. Bob shows up…

Lunatic Ravings

  • The Journey To HR, Part 119!
    by Stephen Johnson
    “Probably not,” I said as the torn apart body parts began to move around, connecting with each other until Bob was whole again. “See?” The HR lady sighed. “Look,” she…
  • The Journey To HR, Part 118!
    by Stephen Johnson
    The HR lady looked down at Bob. “You want what?” she asked. “New feets!” Bob said, pointing at his feetless legs. She mumbled and grumbled as she walked over to…
  • The Journey To HR, Part 117!
    by Stephen Johnson
    When I came to, I heard a loud machine running and what sounded like a young girl screaming. “What’s with the commotion?” I asked as I sat up. “Is it…
  • The Journey To HR, Part 116!
    by Stephen Johnson
    Suddenly, Bob sat up. The applause and my crying stopped. He looked at me. “We made a movie about 60 or 70 years ago,” he said. “Do you remember that?”…
  • The Journey To HR, Part 115!
    by Stephen Johnson
    Bob pointed at me. “You! You I remember,” he said, giving another evil laugh. “Gosh. Really?” I responded, getting a little bit bored with this whole thing. “When I was…

Spamrider

  • The Bullshit Machine
    by Spamrider
    What humanity has created with AI is the ultimate bullshit machine. Everything it creates is bullshit. But creating bullshit is the easy part.  The difference with AI is that it…
  • Stupid
    by Spamrider
    People say this is the stupidest timeline and truth be told they aren’t that far off from being correct. But there is at least one even stupider*.  I know because…
  • 1984
    by Spamrider
    I once jumped back to the year 1984 and met myself as a young man. I don’t know why I did it.  I haven’t even done it yet. I just…
  • The Song in Bob’s Head
    by Spamrider
  • You Better You Bet
    by Spamrider
    You can literally bet on almost anything now.  And I’m not using “literally” in that post-ironic sense where literally means literally the opposite of itself. You can literally literally bet…

Lunatic Column Archives

Visit the archives to discover columns by other writers such as P.S. Gifford, Bel Garion, Melissa Paternick, and Brian Petre. This content has absolutely nothing to do with reality, so it doesn’t really matter when they were published.

You like to jot down stuff just for the fun of it? Feel free to submit a column!