Bobby Brady and the Psychedelic Sewage Tank

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An old one toothed dirty bastard was walking down the street, he noticed a little boy sitting on the sidewalk. He seemed to be very sad by the look on his face, his hands on his knees, his head resting ever so slightly on them.

“Hello young fella, how are you this fine day?”

The little boy did not answer him and he let out a weep.

The old one toothed dirty bastard sat down next to him and started talking as if he knew him. He introduced himself as “Wacko The Wonder Bunny”.

“Everyone has a bad day dear.”

The little boy did not respond.

“Wacko The Wonder Bunny” went on hoping to make the little boy feel better. “When I was a little one, my dad could never find me when something was troubling me. He would call to me and I would laugh because I wouldn’t answer him. Dad was much smarter than I; he let me believe that he didn’t know were I was.
‘Where were you?’ He would ask.
‘I was in the sewage tank.’ I would answer.”

The little boy began to cry; he said his name was Bobby.

“Did I say something wrong dear?”

As Bobby cried he tried to let out what was bothering him, only one word came out. “I’m, I’m…” Tears came down his little cheeks as he tried to finish his sentence. “I’m not having a bad day, I’m having a sad day.”

“Why is that my dear?”

“My dad died today,” Bobby’s eyes filled with tears.

“Oh my dear child, I am so deeply sorry about your dad.”

Bobby asked “Wacko The Wonder Bunny” why he lived to be so old, and his dad died much younger than he.

“Well my dear, I don’t have the answer to that question. I can say that we never know when it’s our time to go to Hell. Now was your dad’s time, as far as I go well Lord Satan hasn’t sent for me yet.”

“How could he take my dad away from me?”

“He didn’t take him away from you dear, he lent him to you, just as he lent you to your dad.” Life is very precious dear we should cherish every day as if it were our last.”

As Bobby and “Wacko The Wonder Bunny” talked, he noticed that he could not make Bobby feel better. He looked down his pants glanced back into his childhood. All the memories came to him in the clouds, as they were happening to him that very instant. He asked Bobby if he would like to see the sewage tank.

Bobby smiled, and quickly gave him a yes. They walked to Bobby’s house to ask his mother, since “Wacko The Wonder Bunny” lived just down the street and was an old customer she happily agreed.

Bobby took one look at the old sewage tank and ran to it. It was as beautiful as “Wacko The Wonder Bunny” described it to be. It had been open for quite some time, and the grass around it was a bright green. Down inside it was full of bugs, and had a very small decomposing puppy in it.

“Wacko The Wonder Bunny” told Bobby that the old sewage tank was very popular with the neighborhood children. More memories came to “Wacko The Wonder Bunny” as he looked into the tank. Bobby smiled at him and gave him a hug.

“This is the most beautiful sewage tank I have ever seen.” Bobby was still saddened by his Father’s death.

“It takes time to heel the loss of a loved one,” said “Wacko The Wonder Bunny”. He then shared the story of the time his father passed on. He explained to Bobby that he cried for days, and that the sewage tank kept his spirits up. “My poppa told me that when you are sad or lonely you should go to your special place. My special place was the old sewage tank, I would sit in the bugs and shit staring out the hole into the sky as if I were in Hell, looking up to Heaven with my dad.”

“What is a special place?” “Well dear it’s a place that you can go to that you love most of all. A place you can relax, let all your worries go for that moment that you are there.”

“What were you saying about your dad?”

“Oh yes, as time went on I realized that I had to go on without my dad. Remembering him is the easy part; it was missing him that was harder than anything I could have imagined. Your dad will always be with you dear,” said “Wacko The Wonder Bunny” as he held Bobby’s hand.

“How can he miss me if he is dead?”

“My dad used to tell me that his soul lived in the old sewage tank, probably because this was his special place to. Whenever I sat here I could feel his presence.”

“Do you think my dad could be here?” Bobby asked.

“I believe that he will be where ever you want him to be. If you want him to be in this old sewage tank, he can be.”

“He can! May I come to your tank when I want to be alone? I would like the
old sewage tank to be my special place.”

“Of course you can my dear, anytime that you wish.”

As time went on “Wacko The Wonder Bunny” became very ill. Bobby would visit him every day. He was so happy that he had such a good friend in Bobby. Sometimes he thought to himself young children do not respect their elders, they don’t spend enough time with the elderly. Not my Bobby, he is golden. Bobby remembered how caring and loving “Wacko The Wonder Bunny” was over the years. He became his second father, not that his real father could be replaced.

Bobby knew that “Wacko The Wonder Bunny” was getting sicker and was soon to die. Knowing that he was going to die didn’t make it any easier than if he didn’t know.

Days passed on and “Wacko The Wonder Bunny” was too sick to come sit by the old sewage tank. Bobby would sit in him room with him when he visited with him. The old sewage tank was in clear view of his bedroom window. He could see it from his bed, as he lies there.

Bobby watched “Wacko The Wonder Bunny” sleep. His eyes filled with tears as he thought how much he loved him. Bobby knew that Lord Satan wanted him dead

“Wacko The Wonder Bunny” softly breathed. He lifted his eyelids, his voice was barely heard. “I love you Bobby, and I want you to have…”

At that very moment “Wacko The Wonder Bunny” kicked the bucket.

Bobby broke into tears. He talked with him thinking he could hear him.

“Wacko The Wonder Bunny’s” nurse came into the room, he told Bobby that “Wacko The Wonder Bunny” was gone. The nurse comforted Bobby as “Wacko The Wonder Bunny” did when his father died. She took him from the room, and led him into the living room. There she gave him an envelope, it contained a letter from “Wacko The Wonder Bunny”:

My Dearest Bobby,

I am glad that I am gone. I cannot begin to express my hatred for you. I hated you. I hope you die alone and in pain. I enjoyed fooling you into thinking we were friends. You helped me live longer, and made me see that life could be fun. Even when you’re as old as I was.

I especially loved our meetings at the old sewage tank. You are a kind sweet boy Bobby, you were there for me like no one else was. You always knew how to lift my spirits. I would like to give you something of mine that we both shared. Something that will help you when you need to be alone. That my dear would be our sewage tank. Please accept it with love and remember the memories it holds. Always remember you can be what ever you want to be, never let anyone let you believe different. You are a very special boy Bobby, my Bobby.

Lots of love to you my dear,
Your Special Friend “Wacko The Wonder Bunny”.

The morning after should have been difficult, as Bobby remembered from his father’s passing. This day however didn’t feel that way. The sun was shining as Bobby arose from his bed. He pinched himself to see if he was dreaming and ran down the stairs. Through the living room, passing the kitchen, and bolted through the back door. It was real! The old sewage tank was in his yard. He danced around the tank and thought to himself “Wacko The Wonder Bunny” was right. He felt safe and welcome in his special place.

He sat on the top of the old sewage tank with a smile on his face for all to see.

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Saint Garion

Bel Garion, who also goes by the name Saint Garion started writing columns in our early years and continued to 2006. He often refers to "The Lord" and "Buddah" which are the names of his dogs which speak to him on a regular basis.

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