The Journey To HR, Part 89!

I found myself back in the HR lady’s office.

“Chickens are stupid, dirty, b*st*rds, just like Stephen Johnson!” I blurted out.

She looked up from the pile of paperwork on her desk.

“What’s that?” she asked.

I repeated what I had blurted.

“What’s with the extra commas and the asterisks?” she asked.

This puzzled me.

I loaded my mouth with gum that I found in one of my pockets and went into my deep-thought mode.

“Ah-HA!” I exclaimed.

She scribbled something on a piece of paper and tossed it into a nearby garbage bin.

“Well?” she asked, leaning back in her chair. “Are you going to try it again?”

I chewed on the gum, blew a nice bubble, let it pop, sucked it back into my mouth and tried again.

“Chickens are stupid dirty bastards, just like Stephen Johnson!” I said, then grinned.

She shook her head sadly.

She held out her hand.

“Give me that gum and maybe I’ll understand what you’re saying?” she said.

I waltzed over to her desk and spit the gum into her hand.

She looked at it, frowned and picked up an empty envelope.

Into a drawer it went.

“Now, let’s try that again and maybe, just maybe, if it’s anything of interest to me, I’ll let you have your gum back.” she said.

I cleared my throat and tried yet again.

“CHICKENS ARE STUPID DIRTY BASTARDS, JUST LIKE STEPHEN JOHNSON!”

She looked stunned.

“Who said this?” she asked, still looking stunned.

“Bob!” I replied.

She opened a drawer and took out an envelope.

“Here’s your gum,” she said, handing it over. “Looks like we’ve got some work to do!”

I grinned again.

Then I opened the envelope.