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3
The boys cautiously prepared for their first test flight. One calm and
bright June morning they wheeled the craft into their pasture. Horace Ibm came up with a suitable weather report
obtained from a satellite discovered by Southern Baptists several years prior. (Since it was never mentioned in
the Bible, they attributed it to the devil.)
Viscous black gold was pumped into the fuel tank; a huge, old goulash pot. The crew, beside Wilberrr and Oreville
consisted of an engineer, four stewardesses and papa Right. Electrical energy which was shipped from Philadelphia
to Texas in a crate by Ben Franklin, was poured into a "starter". A switch was thrown, and in a burst
of acrid smoke, the engine clattered to life and the propellers started to revolve. Oreville, acting as pilot,
gave a thumbs-up signal as neighbors watched in awe. Several KKK members crossed themselves, fumbled with their
rosaries, and chanted in Hebrew. Orville pulled back the sagebrush stick, and the Boing 747, the world's first
truly, authentic, heavier-than-aircraft lumbered down the rutted pasture. Cows bellowed in fear and ran in all
directions. Spectators screamed in delight, as bouncing a few times, the ungainly aircraft slowly became airborne!
It circled the pasture a few times as those watching waved and cheered. It banked to the south and slowly disappeared
over the horizon... Never to be seen again!
This author uncovered evidence in old, official Mexican archives, that not only were the Right brothers the world's
first designers and operators of an aircraft, but that their aircraft was the first one to be skyjacked!
The yellowed and decayed papers, included part of a diary written by Wilberrr. It disclosed that one of the stewardesses,
pulled a Colt .44 revolver from her flight bag and ordered the Rights to fly to Swaziland in Africa, where her
boyfriend, Schmuckel Mumzar, was employed on an agricultural project funded by the United Nations. While never
proven, it was rumored that she was a member of a fervid fundamentalist, Republican Muslim, right-wing, anti-flight
organization. (FFRMR-WA-FO).
Unconfirmed additional information alleges that the plane made a safe landing, but all aboard were slain,
(except the skyjacking stewardess) and the plane taken over by Schmuckel Mumzar, the secret leader of FFRMR-WA-FO.
The information states that the plane was refueled with coconut oil and flown to Sherman, Texas. But that's another
story we'll get into one of these days.
Many of the above facts have been classified as top-secret by the C.I.A. but were leaked to this writer by some
former members of the White House staff, disgruntled over the disclosure that fourteen nuclear devices were sold
to Syria by Israel who said they had too many and had run out of storage space rented in Iraq. But that's another
story for the future.
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